[insert chinese fortune here] in bed

so am i a bad person for having really good sex this morning while the local npr station was airing a show about children getting molested by priests? i'm thinking that a good person would have at least gotten up to turn off the radio, if they couldn't manage a small helping of concern over the troubles of today's youth. ah well.

spent all day yesterday in bed. karl's got a bit of a cough/sore throat, so he called in and said he'd be working from home cough cough. we actually did a couple of hours worth in the morning before our 12 noon scheduled viewing of an episode of futurama (the "love and rockets" episode. funny. millions of chalky candy hearts.) that karl had downloaded. after futurama and lunch, i took a nap while he continued to work. finally, mid-afternoon, i dragged myself out of the stupor i was in and fully intended to do some more work but then karl and i got to talking.

it was a good talk, about our relationship. i am amused by the fact that he is waaaay more worried about freaking me out than i am about freaking him out. here i am, a 26.5 year-old woman, more freaked out about committment and marriage than my 25 year-old boyfriend. though both of us are perfectly capable of having reasonable, non-freak-out conversations about our (possible) future, such as: what *would* i do if karl had to go back to england? what if he asked me to go with him? would i? could i? the thing he says worries him is that life will force us into that sort of decision--and thus the decision to "take our relationship to the next level" (btw, i hate that phrase) before the relationship is naturally ready for it. the thing that worries me is that i can see myself married to karl. but, if you recall, i could (in the bought-a-dress, hired-a-photographer kind of way) see myself married to john, and we all know how that turned out. and, once upon a time, i could have seen myself married to ben. but i was young and stupid. i wonder if my continual ability to see myself married to whoever my current beau is, is a problem. i sorta think it's indicative of me being insecure and desperate and lonely. to paint it in the worst light.

did more work after talking, and finally, about 9:30pm, we decided that we should have some food, so we got up and showered and went to dinner at the white dog. it was yummy (duh). i had baked st. peter's fish with a crabmeat and almond crust, in a lemon-thyme cream sauce, served with glazed cooked carrots and snow peas. ahhhhhh.

so all in all, a very enjoyable day.