am i a hypocrite?

laura just bought a used 2001 honda civic ex, $16,500. she chose this model for safety & reliability. because she transports her kids, she wanted front & side airbags, abs, fog lights. also wanted automatic trans (to save her shoulder), cargo net, automatic doors & windows. dyon (her soon-to-be-ex husband) offered her $2000-3000 (worth of their other car). she really can't afford a new car. however, she insisted on a very late model because older models don't have all the safety features she wants (like side airbags).

in the end, her parents have given her a gift of about $12,000 to buy the car.

my opinion is that she's living beyond her means. i know the safety, health, and happiness of her kids is more important to her than anything. however, i think she's taking it too far. her insistence on buying a car that she can't afford rubs me the wrong way. no car, no matter what safety features, can protect from everything (i know, she's stacking the odds in her favor). if safety is the most important thing, i'm sure their are safer cars out there (saab? volvo?). she'd have to get an older model, to even keep in the $16,000 price range, but if it's all about safety... other people, and other people at other times, have gotten by with less (i know, "other people" is not a good reason (i wouldn't jump off a bridge if other people were doing it). but where's the line? this car is out of her price range--how poor would she have to be before she'd settle for something cheaper? along the same lines, if she's so concerned for her kids' safety, how can she let them be driven around in the camry that dyon drives? this idea that she *has* to spend money that she doesn't have smells (to me) of Privilege. the bad kind. like her family is somehow more important than other people's families, so it's too bad if *they* drive around in less safe cars, but not *her* family.

partly, I think, it's her parents. her father is a renowned doctor and has lots of money. so they can give her $12,000 for a new car. granted, they have the money & they love her & her children, & want to give them everything. maybe its this sense i get of laura that she's never had to struggle for money. affluent upbringing, 4 years at cornell paid for outright by her parents, large expensive house (*not* a usual first home) bought w/ down payment *given* to her by her parents, new car paid for by her parents, pledge from her parents that they would pay for all the education she wants--they were going to pay for Penn until she found out that we get scholarships. and, i don't get the sense that she is instilling the value of a dollar in her kids. her 6 year old just got a new bike that wasn't the most inexpensive even though she'll outgrow it, and doesn't yet do *any* chores.

why do i care? am I just being bitter because i don't get the same benefits from my parents? to laura's credit, she is generous (w/ me & her other friends) w/ her money; she has taken me out to dinner more times than i deserve. and, she seems genuinely grateful to her parents for their generosity to *her.*

i guess what it boils down to is that i disapprove (heads up for values instilled in me by *my* parents) of people living beyond their means. their are so many people who are *very* poor, and yet manage to live w/in their means, that it seems so unfair that some people don't have to. of course, i say this while at the same time accepting $100/mth from my mom, & money from my dad to pay my car insurance.

am I a hypocrite?