fuckin advisor.

if you've been playing along at home, you know that my grant is up at the end of december, and my advisor didn't bother to count me into the funding calculations for next spring because he didn't bother to check with me to see when my grant was up, and just assumed it was up in june 05.

so i was reduced to getting a TA job and a teaching job from the department. this is a Very Heavy Load for a grad student. usually grad students TA 4 classes over their first 4 years. i've done that. i'm fine with TAing again, though. but to TA *and* teach? and teach a class that not only have i never taught before, but i've never even *taken* before? that's going to be a lot of work.

fellow lab member b---- offered to teach the class i'm signed up for, because she's only in her 4th year, and has only TA'd twice (instead of 4 times--she's been on prof grant money last year and this year), and has taught the class i'm signed up for several times, so could teach it in her sleep.

so today we're finally in the lab alone together (advisor out of the country) and she says that she talked to our advisor a couple weeks ago about her taking my teaching gig, and getting half her stipend from that so that i could have half of her grant money. that way, we'd each be getting half our money from teaching and half from TA-ing.

but apparently, advisor said no. well, not quite "no" exactly, but basically no.

he said something about being uncomfortable with this, because something about him wanting her money to come from the grant, and her work being more closely tied to the purpose of the grant than mine. but that he "couldn't stop us" if we wanted to do it sort of under the table.

how this makes me feel:

unsupported.
unimportant.

my 5th year (this is my 7th), i was also SOL in terms of funding. for a different reason, back then. so i sucked it up and waited tables. then, i won a grant, and have been supporting myself for the last 2 years.

this time, it's not really my fault. see, if my advisor had (a) known, or (b) bothered to find out when my grant was up (december, not june like he thought), he could have kept b---- on department funds (she's still eligible since she's a 4th year) and i could have been funded off the grant. but he just assumed my grant went til june and figured i didn't need the money, so he told the dept he could fund b---- off his grant so that they could have the money to admit one more student.

leaving me out in the cold.

again.

and now, NOW, he has the gall to say no to a perfectly good solution that me and b---- came up with! what a fucker!

so, i'm going to be teaching in the spring. and TA-ing. and getting no research done, and getting no closer to getting the fuck out of here.

3 years with the british boy

16 September 2004 - 3:38 pm

today is karl's and my 3 year anniversary. yay! 3 years ago today he showed up at my apartment for our first date of beers on the stoop*. i was impressed by his audi TT (sadly gone now) and loved his northern english accent and clear blue eyes. he was even game for ethiopian food, which counted for lots of bonus points. we've been to dahlak many times since, especially once we moved in together since dahlak was right across the street from our apartment.

for our anniversary, i got him a cheesecake from the cheesecake factory. have no idea if he's doing anything for me. i'm sure you'll hear about it tomorrow.

*stoop-sittin' was a favorite activity at that apartment, since it had such a good porch. our last apartment had the lovely balcony, but no easily-used stoop since our apt was on the 3rd floor. i hope to institute a return to stoop-sittin' at the new house, though. it has a perfect stoop--a real stoop. (real stoop being defined as just a few steps leading directly to the front door, with no porch. don't get me wrong, porches are all kinds of nice, but a real, honest-to-goodness stoop has to lack a porch. and thus it is written.)